I received permission to write about this. 

The story is better than this, but the only person whose whole process I am at liberty to put out there on this page is my own.


******


She came into the room with the name “oxygen waster.”


I shouldn’t have laughed at it.


Because she kind of meant business.


But I did laugh.


I saw other people do the same thing: 


“LOL. OMG I LOVE YOUR NICKNAME.”


She was confused: Why is that so god damned funny to everyone? 


Because we’ve all felt like that before.


She explained that she got it from a band.


Not everyone comes back.


But she came back.


And then she came back again.


It only took a couple of days before the chat robot offered another animal in the hunting game.


Somebody typed !axe


I don’t even know what the bot says anymore. Something like: “Whoop whoop! [your] hatchet swings right and left, [you] have massacred a [$animal]. This juggalo killer has smoked X animals.”


The new arrival has a question: “wait, which one of you is the juggalo?”


The near 40-year-old with a hatchet girl tattoo who wrote the website with the aforementioned juggalo Easter egg.


“Mmfwcl”


“MCL”


And when she said we made her cry and want to live,


I cried too.


Maybe other people leave this place with hope,


But I’m not usually one of them.